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 Prayers and lots of them.
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mommyof2 Member |
posted 03-29-2005 06:45 PM
  
Ok moms’ and dads’ I have a 12 year old girl on my basketball team, she’s a little thing with the mouth of a truck driver. Apparently she is being raised by her aunt on her dad’s side and still has contact with her mother (who I think is in jail or rehab or something), and her father died (I believe he was murdered) and I am not sure if the mother had anything to do with it. Anyhow she has been with her aunt for 11 years and has a social worker who she sees twice a week; she does have an older brother who also lives with her aunt. Did I mention she is also extremely ADHD? Anyhow I have tried to get her to stop cursing and once asked her where she learned those bad words and she said from her mother. She tends to have outburst and stomps off. As you can see I have a troubled youth on my hands. I want to do everything in my power to encourage her to do well. So far I have told her that if she continues to stomp off she will have to run laps when she returns, as for her language I have encouraged her to use such words as dagnabbit or fudge so far she has agreed but still slips every now and then, I did have a talk with her and told her that I thought she was a great kid with a lot of potential but not too many people will get the chance to know that because first impressions tell a different story, and how someone that doesn’t know her might perceive her differently if they heard her cursing. Last week she called and asked what would happen if she missed practice and I told her that she wouldn’t play as much she then said I’ll see you at practice coach. I know she has the desire to play the game and I am using that as a bargaining tool, I have recruited the other girls on the team to encourage her to stop cursing by using positive feed back such as making the effort to point out her good qualities and to work with her to help improve her game, she seems to be responding well to that. All in all she truly is a great kid who just needs some positive people in her live. What I need from all of you are prayers that God will bring more positive people in her life. Thanks! Lisa |
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2setsofroses Member |
posted 03-29-2005 08:19 PM
Hi Lisa...I think maybe that someone has prayed this samed prayer for this young girl and God already is answering. I do not think it is any accident that she is on your team. I will certainly keep you all in my prayers...keep us posted. Many Blessings...Marilyn |
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lkellyhappy1 Member |
posted 03-30-2005 05:40 AM
Prayers Lisa. I have been watching nanny 911  and nanny deb would say that she needs to learn a better way to communicate. I think that they should call it nanny deb. |
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MN110 Member |
posted 03-30-2005 03:53 PM
Prayers for you! I'll pray for the Lord to give you patience, it sounds like you need it! My older sister coached varsity cheerleading for 2 seasons, it's a tough job! Just don't forget positive reinforcement and rewards for good behavior! Perhaps you could make a deal? Maybe you can ask her what she wants for a reward from you if she makes it through a week or a month of practice w/o swearing? Bribery is a heckuva good tool... |
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mommyof2 Member |
posted 03-30-2005 06:15 PM
Marilyn, I was thinking the same thing. Not sure she needs Nanny Deb if anything just some positive reinforcement and consequences, she now know that each time she does not follow instructions during practice she needs to sit out for 5 min. I’ve also told her that if she shows up to each practice and focuses and no cursing that I will start her that following week. That seems to work. I have also extended my services and told her and others on the team that if they cannot find a ride I will pick them up so no excuses. Yeah bribery can be a great tool. Last Saturday I gave out Easter treats for the good work they did. Today during lunch hour I picked up a video and coaching book on girls basketball. Can’t wait to practice some of the new drills I’ve learned. I’ll keep you posted and thanks for the prayers. [This message has been edited by mommyof2 (edited 03-30-2005).] |
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leigh1517 Member |
posted 03-30-2005 07:27 PM
She's very lucky to have you in her life. It sounds like you're doing everything right - letting her know that you care and that you think she's special and balancing that with consequences. I will pray for her (and you). |
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lkellyhappy1 Member |
posted 03-31-2005 06:19 AM
Lisa dont you ever get tired??? |
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mommyof2 Member |
posted 03-31-2005 11:07 AM
Yippy yah! My little gal didn’t say not one curse word during practice yesterday and we practice for 1 1/2 hours. As a reword she’ll be starting for Saturday’s game. You should have seen the smile on her face. All my girls did well yesterday, we did some new drill from the book and video and I saw great improvement. Lee-Ann as for "don’t I ever getting tired" I don’t have time, plus I love what I do, as a matter of fact my bf and I are starting tennis lessons tonight and right after I’m going straight to the gym to coach my girls. For the first time I find myself living life to the fullest and loving it! I have learned to balance all aspects of my life and to think it only took me 41 years to learn how to do that Lisa [This message has been edited by mommyof2 (edited 04-05-2005).] |
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