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 i'm new here...Son Boyfriend problm ..urgent
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| Author | Topic: i'm new here...Son Boyfriend problm ..urgent |
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ingrid66 New Member |
posted 06-23-2006 01:30 AM
  
Hi every one. I'm new here and I really hope someone will help me. I'm divorced with a daughter of 19 and a son of 12. After my divorce i met a guy, since 4 years we are living together with the kids. My problem is that he is so distant with my kids particularly with my son. Things are getting worst, now he just ignores my son, and this is affecting me a lot. When I ask him to act differently he just says that he has nothing to say. He refuses to admit that he cant stand my son. I really dont knw wht to do I am feelin so guilty about all this. I wanted a familly bcause my kids and I wnt through much violence before. How can I handle this? Living with a guy who makes as if my kids do not exsist. He does not help me at all with my kids for him it's just the 2 of us. He is just trying to bare with thm. I admit tht my son is very close to me and at the beginning of our relationship he has been naughty with my boy friend but I dont believe its a reason to hate a kid. My boyfriend told me tht his relation with my kids won't change, meaning he'll never be close to them. He wants me to accept that they will always be strangers living in the same house!! My boyfriend says that as long as he does not bully my kids it does matter if they dont talk to each other. I'm getting sick wth that. I just want to have a real familly. and this is startin to affect my kids, my daughter just told me she no longer wnted to stay with him. I'm always afraid that things degenerate and that there is a fight between my son and my boyfriend. He considers my son as b.. ch.. he nevers speaks to him never wnts to knw anything about his studies or anything, he acts as if my son does not deserve even a smile. The poor kid cant even make a noise in the house while playing or just being happy being a kid. I think someone here has to tell me tht I have nothing to do with that guy. Please help give me the courage to take a decision. |
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~*FallenAngel*~ Member |
posted 06-23-2006 08:47 AM
im sorry......and tell me again why your still with the man??...he treats your kids like they are nothing ..let me guess you love him??? COME ON...stop letting this man degrade your children and treating them like they are strangers in their own house, if you dont wise up your not even gonna have your children let alone a family because they are gonna walk out on you first... your kids come first, and if this man cant respect your children then what does that tell you? hes not capable of "family" and hes already told you the way he treats your children will not change so why let your children to be continued to be treated like trash because of a man that says he cares about you but not your children?? thats just crazy, im sorry im not usually this forward, but stuff like this really pisses me off, some people just need to step back from their own feelings and see how things are affecting their kids and start putting them first |
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mommyof2 Member |
posted 06-23-2006 10:43 AM
This man cannot possible love you for to love you would be to love all of you (kids included). My mom had a live in that did the same thing to us, things were so bad that when eating I was not allowed to let the fork make noise when touching the plate. We had to watch what he wanted on t.v., and we were to be seen not heard; I pretty much live in fear of getting him mad. Thank god my mom finally took a stand and kicked him to the curb. No man is worth your child happiness. From that day forward we had the best family relationship; there was much laughter in the house and although we had to go without because mom was supporting 5 kids on one income we always made the best of it. To this day we look back and laugh at how mom always managed to make a 3 course meal with fried baloney, macaroni, and beans. LOL – still eat that every now and then but this time by choice. I say dump the guy he’s not worthy of your love. |
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lkellyhappy1 Member |
posted 06-23-2006 12:23 PM
The kids come first, they only get to be kids once for a short time and making them suffer for something that is not thier fault is wrong. Going out on your own with the kids is scary but it is much better then living with a jerk. |
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Teenika4 Member |
posted 12-10-2006 07:41 PM
You posted your letter in June. I just joined this website, this is why my response is late. GET THAT MAN OUT OF YOUR LIVES!!! NEVER,I mean NEVER, put your kids down for any man--even if he walks on water. Any man that cannot accept your children is NOT worthy of you. KICK HIM TO THE CURB NOW,before he ends up doing something to your kids to harm them physically--he's already damaging them emotionally and mentally. WAKE UP--you deserve better, and so do your kids! I will pray for all of you. God bless!! |
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