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Author	Topic: is there any hope
babygirl42485 Member	posted 12-09-2005 01:55 PM I am owed child support but the problem is the father is in jail and facing 6- 13 years. I have talked to the state and other agencies and the all say there is nothing that can be done since he is in jail. I wonder are they right or is there something that can be done? please help. Thank you all for your words and comments.I would like to add that I was not with this man at the time he did this in fact I was not with him every since my daughter who was two was born. Up until this point he was trying to be a good dad and paying and visiting her. I just don't understand what would of gotten into his head to make him do something like that. Its not just about the child support any more its the fact the crime he did is so awful I don't know now if I want my daughter to know him. I have a loving boyfriend who she considers her dad and he has been theresince day 1. I just wanted what was best for my child, I am not struggling but it would be nice to give her more then what I had growing up. anyways I thank everybody for there love and support. [This message has been edited by babygirl42485 (edited 12-10-2005).]
NCP Member	posted 12-09-2005 05:15 PM What is up with you women hooking up with these convicts? No, they are right there is nothing you can do, you had a baby with a loser and now the only one that loses is your child.
jezze312 Member	posted 12-09-2005 07:16 PM Oh my gosh. Umm, to the person who just wrote that last comment(NCP), shame on you. In fact, screw you. You shouldn't even be allowed to be a member on this site. We do not respond to other people's comments on this website by saying stuff like that. Saying the phrase"you women" is degrading and wrong. Who's to say this guy was like this when she met him? He could have just done this thing that got him landed in jail. Honestly, you need to find another website where you can say whatever it is you feel you have to say to people that doesn't offend them. And if you have a problem with this, then you can feel free to email me. YOU ARE RUDE.... To baby... Your child does not have to "lose" just because your ex or boyfriend..whatever...is in jail. There are things you can do. You can get any of his assets seized by the government if he has no other money. This means cars, house, anything. Keep looking and don't give up. There is ALWAYS state aid. Look on the internet and try to get a lawyer if you can. Don't stop fighting. It is not your fault. Don't listen to that %@#hole who wrote that other stuff to you.
Bluebird Member	posted 12-09-2005 07:46 PM NCP, I second Jezze's motion. We're not here to tear each other down. Maybe you don't belong here.
kedcse Member	posted 12-09-2005 11:44 PM babygirl42485, the agencies are right, you can't reasonably expect this guy to pay his support while he is incarcerated, can you? It's unfortunate the child will miss out emotionally(and financially)from him being there, but there is nothing one can do to get him to pay.. NCP was being an ass, but has a point..I have seen many of woman come into our office requesting child support cases be open, then close them w/one thing in common, it's when the man goes to jail/prison, then gets out.. then they have another kid 9 months later, then she comes back to request services.. I would also like to point out, woman know more about the man then they lead on. An overwhelming amount are aware that the guy either has been in prison or expects to be there. I've heard many of times "well he wasn't like that when I met him"..That's just another white lie. He might not have been like that when you met him, but him being put in jail and the actions leading to it didn't happen overnight. Were there clues that the guy was somewhat shady? Sure there was.. And I do have to add that seizing his assets, if any, is very costly..The child support agencies are not mandated to do that, because all the court costs, investigations and time consumption are not within the scope of agency, but if the custodial parent can provide all the asset info(cars, boats, houses)and front the costs of the seizure, then the child support agency can intiate the action in the courts.. Also, there are alternatives other than going on state aid, like actually getting a job. [This message has been edited by kedcse (edited 12-09-2005).] [This message has been edited by kedcse (edited 12-09-2005).]
shawn single dad	posted 12-10-2005 12:35 AM quote: I do not know if you guys do anything about offensive comments from your members, but I have found someone who was incredibly RUDE to a woman in need of some advice. The member's name is NCP and the comments that this person made are on the chatboards under childsupport. The woman who wrote the first comment is named babygirl(some numbers after) and the member NCP wrote the most uncaring comment. This website is supposed to help people, not put them down. I hope something can be done about this matter. Thank you, Jessica
shawn single dad	posted 12-10-2005 01:03 AM babygirl, sorry you are caught in the crossfire, both here and in life, we all love you and pray for your growth... you are at a point where you need to find and take advantage of every resource, and make every attempt, to improve yourself, to grow, to live. Let ME count how many mistakes I've made ... 1, 300, 4 milliom ... woohoo you are in like company babygirl

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