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 The Ex is driving me crazy
 visitation worries- please help!!
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| Author | Topic: visitation worries- please help!! |
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rebeccalouise Member |
posted 04-29-2009 07:59 AM
 
Hi basically I am 38 weeks pregnant with my 1st baby. Me and my partner were together for 2 years until i left when i was 4months pregnant due to his blurred social boundaries. He has behavioural problems and learning diffculties, but he would do frightening things to me in the house; ie pick the bathroom lock when i was in the bathroom, insist on doing a vaginal internal on me if i had a bug, talk to 3 year old family members about sex etc... He has hardly been in touch since I left however when he does contact me he tells me that he will see the baby when he likes when its born and not when i say so. Ive expressed my concerns to my midwife and said that I dont see that he poses a risk to the child when im present, once a week for a couple of hours. I dont know what to do to make sure he gets no more than this... im surviving on 2 hours sleep a night and vomiting because im so tired with 2 weeks until my due date. Please help!! xxx |
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Charlies_Mama Member |
posted 05-26-2009 08:30 PM
First off...you need to relax! You being this stressed and worried isn't going to do anything but hurt the baby. Please try to relax, really. Second thing....once the baby is born you need to go down to your local friend of the court office and get vistations set up. Your ex can't just come and take you baby. My ex and I split when my son was 5 wks old....and he was not able to just come and take Charlie when he felt like it. Have you ever heard of the saying, "posession is 9 tenths of the law?" Well this is so true. Once you have the baby you DO NOT let him take your baby until visitation has been determined. If you do and he decides not to come home with the baby there is nothing the police can do about it....nothing. The police are not going to come to your place and take your child because your ex called saying you were keeping him from him either. My attorney told me this, and I lived by this rule until visitation was set up. You do not have to let him see his child, not at all, and honestly I didn't and I don't feel bad at all for not letting my ex see Charlie. Shoot my ex went over 4 wks without seeing Charlie before visitation was established. I hope this helps. |
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kimber72 Member |
posted 06-05-2009 05:10 PM
Make getting a custody agreement a priority. In my state possession is NOT 9/10 of the law. My ex could have taken the kids for his weekend and NOT returned them and it would have NOT been considered kidnapping becuase we were still working on visitation rights. A friend of mine's ex took her kids to Holland, it was not considered kidnapping becuase he took them BEFORE cusotdy agreements were signed, it took her 3 years of fighting to get them back. Not to make you more worried but get that custody agreement. If necessary, the state can assign a custody mediator and child advocate, you may want to ask for one right off the bat given your ex's history |
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