posted 01-21-2008 08:45 PM            

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I have been officially divorced now for two weeks. Can you believe the jerk actually cried, and said he was sorry for everything he had ever done to me, and that he told his lawyer that our divorce was one that should not have happened....yet two days later was being jerk again.

Anyway, I thought once I was divorced I would feel better. I am not sure I do. I am glad it is over and it is a relief for it to be over, but once again this past weekend my kids got left with a babysitter. I am not sure that it kills me so much that the girls are left with a sitter so much as he is going out and he REFUSED (and I am using that term in capitals lightly) to get a babysitter for us, because babysitters and dinner or movies cost money. So why is it okay now that he get a babysitter to go out with the whore and her friends? I get the feeling he is following her more than anything, becuase she would go out without him. But it just pisses me off, if he would have just nurtured the marriage we would have been okay....UGH!!!!

posted 02-17-2008 06:01 PM            

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Hang in there! I have read many of your comments and I feel you are coming a long ways, you are getting better. Try not to worry about what he is doing right now. It is going to be opposite of what you expect and it won't change who he is. It has been over a year since my wife left and about 6 months since the divorce finalized and I can finally sit back and pity my ex because I see that she is having difficulty right now. I think a lot of it is because she has been in one relationship after another since she left me, actually before that, but she has not stopped and taken the time to heal.

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Christian Single Dad

posted 03-25-2008 08:33 PM         

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I do understand where you are coming from. I have only been divorced for a short time after so very many years of marriage. I can't say what it will be like in a year or two. But I can add that there are so very many ups and downs...mostly downs...in the beginning. Hang in there! Be patient with yourself! (And try to be as prepared as possible for the ex to do unkind and inconsiderate things...I know from experience).

And (just my opinion) don't make any major dramatic decisions during the first year. I have seen many women (and men) do surprising things to hide from the pain. Give yourself time to get adjusted to the new situation.

As for the precious little ones I find that I am learning to turn them over to God. It is not easy...not at all. In fact, it is the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

All times are CT