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 Friend Attempted Suicide
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| Author | Topic: Friend Attempted Suicide |
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jwg Member |
posted 08-27-2007 09:01 AM
  
Early this morning a very troubled friend called to say he was planning to commit suicide. Because he was talking in the past tense about everything I took him seriously and called EMS to help him. He had in fact (as he threatened to do) taken sleeping pills with a great amount of alcohol. He's in the hospital now and just regained consciousness early this evening but what hope is there for someone who has absolutely no support system? His family is just a big a mess as he is and from what I can tell I am his only friend who doesn't drink or use drugs. How can I help him? His mother, who lives less than 1 block from the hospital he is in, didn't even come up to check on him today. He has so much good in him but is so tormented by his past and the current people in his life that I wonder how, or even if, he will make it. Do any of you have any experience with this type of situation? My friends keep telling me to turn my back and walk away but how can I do that in good conscience? I could never have lived with myself knowing that he could have died last night simply because I didn't feel like getting out of bed to answer the phone. [This message has been edited by jwg (edited 08-27-2007).] |
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susa7805 Member |
posted 08-27-2007 09:04 AM
You did the right thing. Be there as much as you are able |
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Bluebird Member |
posted 08-30-2007 04:26 PM
Juanita, I think people often have little or no support system because the people in their lives choose to walk away and not be supportive. Family circumstances are not always voluntary, and most people are very wrapped up in superficial things and don't really offer each other much support. I think being suicidal is a completely different problem that has little to do with the person's support system. Personally, I've had- and still have- next to no support system yet I would never contemplate suicide. I've known people who have done this and, I'm sorry if I sound callous, they were all generally pathologically self-centered, sick individuals. Still, I would offer my support. I would try to share my view that life is a blessing, and that we all have a purpose. I think leaving those who care about you to forever ponder your suicide is one of the greatest mistakes you can make. Maybe you could gently make that point. Honestly, I do believe that we are also tested in how we treat others in need. I think you're where you are because you're needed to help this person. [This message has been edited by Bluebird (edited 08-30-2007).] |
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Bluebird Member |
posted 09-02-2007 12:52 PM
Your friend has really been on my mind. How is he doing? I have to admit that your "friends" who tell you to turn and walk away from this person in need really amaze me. I mean who, with any kind of heart or conscience could even suggest something so cold and uncaring? I'm assuming this guy is your friend, as you say. He must have been a good enough friend to feel he could call you in such a desperate moment. He must be hurting so much. I really wonder how he'd feel if he knew that this friend is barely there for him. |
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jwg Member |
posted 09-02-2007 07:20 PM
Thanks for your words of support. My friend is doing okay physically but did not get the psychological evaluation he desperately needed. His mom signed him out of the hospital (I am assuming) so that she could escape any blame since she was the one who had been giving him her sleeping pills (which he saved up). I am absolutely furious with her. I care a great deal for him and I know he trusts me on a level he has never trusted anyone else. You're right that family support is voluntary and I agree with you completely that we come into each other's lives for a purpose. I think I know my purpose in his life, I'm just not sure what his is in mine. I'm sure there is a lesson I'm supposed to be learning. My friends don't know him at all and their advice to walk away is based on their concern for me and how I internalize things to my own detriment. In their defence, they are just looking out for me. He and I spent most of yesterday together and did alot of talking. He knows he has to make some changes in his life and stand up to the people that use him - many of whom are family members. I know he wants to do it, but these things are easier said than done. At this point all I think I can do for him is make sure he knows he has my friendship and support when he needs me. |
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